Archive for May 17th, 2010

Quit Apologizing!

I’m sorry, but there’s a form of insecurity that just gets to me! Actually, I’m not sorry because this form can be so subtle that many people don’t think they are slaves to it.Sorry

Apologizing is an important social skill. Knowing how to properly apologize when you have wronged someone is good. But I’m not talking about your normal apologies. I’m talking about the sickening, self-focused, excessive apologizing that latches on to victims of sever insecurity.

Have you ever experienced this with someone? Have you ever been around someone who excessively apologizes for everything?  What about a look in the mirror? Do you often find yourself apologizing for meaningless things?

What is the cause of this?

From my study of insecurity in people I’ve come to the conclusion that individuals who unreasonably apologize are looking for validation. They are looking for those who will reply to their apology with phrases like, “Oh, it’s okay.” “You’re fine.” “Don’t worry about it.”

When they can get this kind of response out of people it makes them feel less insecure about who they are or what they are doing. But this is a horrible and short-lived way to gain validation. In fact, I would go so far to say that overly apologizing to gain validation only causes a person to dive deeper into the deadly cycle of insecurity.

It’s time to Quit Apologizing! Find freedom from this form of insecurity by gaining your validation from what Christ says about you, not how others respond to your apologies.

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